Tuesday, August 03, 2004

Forget the broccoli, would you like another candybar?

This is from drudge, so its veracity is questionable, and throw in that ol' den hastert (who is what I imagine Drew Carey might be like if he weren't funny and intelligent, just fatter and a selfish asshole) is part of the story and chances are that this is just so much spinning smoke, but everyone's favorite closet-case has a little story saying that the psycho-repubs (these people just really aren't anything like real republicans in anything but name, but I am still waiting for the real Republicans to stand up and take their party back) are planning to eliminate the IRS.

Ok, no one likes the IRS. I'm not inviting too many IRS agents to my dinner parties, but you know what? I do like roads and schools and public parks and even the f'n military. Yeah, sure - we will just pay for everything with sales taxes. Could you make the taxes on fast food cost more than the food itself? That would be so cool. If I could just pay more for everything all the time, wow!!!! Please, let me vote for that.

This is like when every dumb kid in elementary school gets asked, "What would you do if you were president?" "I would make homework illegal and give everyone in America french fries and icecream for dinner every night," or some variation there of. Sure it is cute to hear a kid talk about making recess all day long by law or locking the least popular kid in school in jail forever, but this is exactly the reason we don't let kids run the govenment. And did no one show these idiots any very-special-episodes of eighties sitcoms or a kids in charge movies?

When the mean old babysitter dies (don't tell Mom!) while your parents are gone for the summer, sure it is more fun to shoot the plate as your brother throws them off the roof instead of washing them, but then you have nothing to eat on and you start fighting and your hot older sister has to fake a resume and get a fabulous job in fashion, but the point is you still have to make things work. When kids run wild, Cherry gets trapped in an old refrigerator and almost dies!

Ask Piggy what he thinks about how kids run things.

Sorry if I am calling a bunch of sad old men children, but sorry, saying you are going to get rid of the IRS is the political eqivalent of saying you are going to replace vegetables with candy bars in the cafeteria when you are class president in elementary school.

I hear ya Jenny: Lord protect us from what we want.

My apologies if this just turns out like so much of drudge -irresponsible spin- but sorry guys, bad ideas are what you are best at.

No comments: